Bad luck. God. And vanilla extract

We’ve had a string of bum luck this November. We started the month on task and on budget. Then within 5 days, I got sick and ran up a few medical bills. Our cat got sick and needed care. Our kitten wandered into the big dogs’ pen and was killed. Then my spouse caught what I had and ran up some medical bills and lost wages. We are BROKE.

I prayed for a lot of things. Grace. Grief relief for the kitten. Thanks for all we are blessed with. (Affordable,  attainable healthcare. ) I also prayed for those with so many other needs.

I decided to make banana bread for bible study tonight, even though I was out of vanilla and couldn’t afford more. And then I found some! It was enough to finish the recipe. I also found some cleaner that I was looking for and couldn’t afford. And tucked behind another bottle, there it was.

It’s as though God was reminding me and witnessing to me in the tiny things. He is always with us. Never forsaking us. I’m not worried about getting through the rest of the year with bills. He is with us every step of the way for an eternity. 

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Breathe in, breathe out

I got comfy and cozy in our big red chair. Hit the *start* button. Fluffy clouds drifted across the tv screen as a gentle male voice started to guide me into a relaxing and restorative meditation. The dog scratched at the door. ! €$+,=£! ₩×,+!#~[▪

I hit the *pause* button. Let the dog out. Check my phone, use the bathroom. Let the dog in. Get cozy again. Hit *play*.

The soothing voice urges again  me into a gentle and soothing state and then, the cat MEOWS. 

Hit *pause*. Attend to cat. He wanted kibble. Try to relax. Dog wants to play and the cat wants out. My feet are cold. I start thinking about my to do list. Stuff the critters and my to do list. $€÷;#¥#, $:!

Am I trying to do to much? 

@^$¥!;! £! You might be thinking. You stay the ×:$÷;#8=* home. How in the heck can you run out of time?

I am trying to meditate (fail), do yoga (once), and journal (maybe) daily. The weather has turned colder and I am trying to walk 2 miles per day, 4 to 5 times per week to keep my metabolism from dialing down into hibernation mode. We can’t afford a gym membership right now. It’s difficult to walk at home with my creepy neighbor’s dog constantly on the loose, harassing me and my little dog. I end up driving 10 miles to town, in conjunction with other errands, to walk unmolested. 

Did I mention I am on a diet, and trying my own version of the Warriors’ fast, by eating only between the hours of 1pm and 9pm? (Most days)

I wanted to launch into November with the above challenges and a frugal grocery challenge.  That hasn’t turned out like I planned, but it’s good practice. I’m a slut for bargains! Would I blow my own challenge to shop Halloween clearance? In a New York minute I would, and did. We’re talking 90% off. I have a holiday tradition of giving the wonderful and weird Halloween clearance finds as Christmas gifts. 

I have to cut this short, eat an apple covered in ginger (plantar fasciitis) and cinnamon (good for blood sugar) and walk or hobble 2 miles. Then I get 2 kids from 2 different locations and host a pizza and popcicle fueled play date. I will drop the last child off at church. We’re having a movie night. (Yay, adulting! )

Later yall. Whooosh

pick something and commit! 

I go to church with a guy who just made the jump to professional artist. He’s worked hard at it, both the art, and sales and even uses it as a seed planting tool. I find him inspiring to say the least. 

I am in my tenth month of retirement. I absolutely do not want to go back to the trenches of healthcare. From what I hear from former colleagues,  things have gone from bad to worse. Ugh. I have dabbled in a few different volunteer venues, and only one has been a good fit. I was searching for an outlet that didn’t involve children or health care. Between church activities and babysitting,  I get plenty of kid time. I need adulting. I need to unclog the rust from my brain and branch out from this quiet happy little corner of the world. I am in the midst of a 30 day journal and meditation experiment. If it goes well, I want to branch off into writing and photography. 

At least 5 days a week I am trying to put pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard and ponder and muse. Practice for the joy of it, like my artist friend, and see what becomes of it.

the effects of long term stress on the body and mind

I need to do a study on this. I still can’t watch a suspenseful show on tv without getting anxiety. I don’t want to be around new people or situations. I wanted to do some medically related volunteer work, but the thought of cranky folks who don’t cover their mouths when they cough is enough to turn me away. I can barely babysit for 4 hours without being completely exhausted. I have yet to heal from my long time in the trenches. 

March 9th

I meant to post a while ago about a quick and easy meal I threw together. We cook a turkey twice a year, and freeze some of the meat. Turkey ended up being a perfect addition to this jambalaya mix. I added 2 extra cans of beans and  made a crockpot full of dinner that lasted 3 days.